When “I’m Not Ready Yet” Becomes a Pattern

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Before I had a coaching practice, I signed up for a coaching program. I finished it, decided it had not quite prepared me, and searched for something better. I did this several times. I did the same thing with writing. I collected a couple book-writing courses before I ever wrote a book. Each time, I told myself I was getting ready. I had binders, notes, and good intentions. What I didn’t have was a single client or a finished chapter because I never got a good start.

Last week we talked about making your own ink. I made gallons of it. I was so busy gathering what I thought would help me do the job better that I kept skipping the part where you sit down and do the actual work.

Underneath all that productive looking effort was a thought rooted in procrastination. “I’m not ready yet.” It was a thought that shaped years of my life into a pattern. Using a tool I call the Clarity Loop, I can now make sense of what happened and how I was able to change things. You have a thought, which creates a feeling, which leads you to take action, which creates a result and that result loops you right back to the thought.

Let me walk you through mine. The thought was, “I’m not ready yet.” That thought created a feeling of discomfort. I took action in the form of avoidance by signing up for another course. The result? No clients and no experience, which proved the original thought. See, I told you I wasn’t ready.

We’re going to look at a book by Jon Acuff, next week, but for this week, I want to share one of his thoughts: “Procrastination is when your actions don’t match your intentions.” The Clarity Loop is how we can see where things don’t match up. If we want to make our intentions match our actions, we can’t let unexamined thought loops run our lives and make our decisions. When it’s running in the wrong direction, you’ll feel stuck, maybe a little ashamed, undisciplined, or lazy. When you can see the thought loop, you can get curious about the thought that started the whole thing and decide whether you want to follow it.

Here’s a clarity loop to tape to your fridge, or your bathroom mirror so you can test some of your thoughts. For this week, see if you can catch one thought loop around something you’re procrastinating doing. Just write it down. Be gentle with yourself while you look. Seeing your own loop can sting a little and grace helps you look at it long enough to learn.

So…

Notice the ink-making

See the loop.

I’ll be cheering you on,